Dear Me,

A letter to my teenage self…

I know you are busy trying to be a cool teenager and all but, I just wanted to write you a quick note to let you know a few things…

First, let’s just go ahead and make a pact now…

…no more perms m’kay? Really, they do nothing for you, and while I’m at it, those jingle bell socks you have on are cute on Christmas Day for about 90 seconds, but whatever you do, do not wear them to school, it will just further the distance between you and the normal kids who don’t dress weird.  I know you love them because you have a thing for quirky and don’t believe me, so please just trust me?

Yep, you and Emily, together as usual. In your freshman year of college Emily will begin to become a friend instead of just a pesky little sister. By the time you graduate, you’ll be a united front to be reckoned with.

You two will always think you are funnier than you are and that is just fine. Not only that but Emily will write a book one day about being a Good Girl and all those times she tattled?… will be worth it.

I know in this photo you are smiling but really wondering what time you get to go to bed.  It’s probably 8:45pm.  Guess what, I have great news! There is nothing wrong with you!!!  It turns out that you are an early bird, it doesn’t go over well in high school and college but it pays off as an adult.  Don’t sweat it.

Being a Young Life leader will be the first time you feel like a grown up and the first time you actually like hanging out with people you don’t know very well.  Again, let me reiterate, nothing was wrong with you in high school, you aren’t a crazy, creepy reclusive hermit, you are an INTJ!  It’s a great personality, no matter what everyone says!

I know, I know, reading all of this makes you feel SO MUCH BETTER!  You aren’t mean, you’re just an INTJ! Phew!

I’m sorry I spent so much time talking about INTJs, but until you found out about personality types, you didn’t know what to think of yourself. Who cares that most INTJs are men? And also villains?  It’s so great to know you can embrace your personality!

Look, what an AMAZING personality you have!!

You will have so much fun with these girls in college.  Don’t worry, you’ll go to Columbia International University (it will be called Columbia Bible College when you are there) and there will be fewer people in your freshman class of college than in your high school graduation class–big sigh of relief!

You’ll meet your future husband when you are 18 and yes, you’ll have that picnic table that you always dreamed of.  You always did dream big.

Lastly, all that “playing Barbies” you did up until you were 15?  No need to be embarrassed, I figured out you weren’t actually playing with the dolls, you were just playing with the furniture.  Don’t question it, but it will serve you well.

signed, Nester

(oh, wait, I guess I should explain that Nester thing too…)

This Dear Me post written to my teenage self is part of my baby sister‘s celebration for her newest book, just release called Graceful. It’s a book for young women (remember her first book, Grace for the Good Girl, for us grown ups?–it’s like that only really different because it’s for teenage girls).

Find out more about the book here.

This letter was so fun to write, you should write one too! Emily is hosting a link up this Friday for anyone who wants to write a Dear Me letter to their teenage self.

Me, Emily and Michael Jackson


  1. What a great idea. I don’t know what I’d tell the teenage me. Probably nothing the teenage me would want to believe. Like how my mom was right about stuff. And the INTJ was hilarious. I kept thinking “that is my dad!” and laughing. Until I started noticing things like, “I don’t like surprises. What’s wrong with arguing a different view point that I don’t really believe? Sarcasm and hyperbole make language interesting.” Maybe my mother was right and I am “just exactly like your daddy.” Please refer to previous comments about teenage me.

    I should probably get my husband to read those. He thinks I’m anti-social. :) He is not. :)

  2. LOVE the MJ cameo. :)

  3. I was a young life leader too! Holla! My high school honey, (now husband), started taking me to YL club my sophomore year. We both became leaders throughout college. Best thing we ever did! Definitely miss it so much! Especially camp!

  4. Nester, One of the characteristics was dislike for people/relationship talk and that one really surprised me. As an introvert, I related to most of the descriptions but not that one. How about you?

    • “we hate small talk, gossip and relationship/people talk” I would agree with that for the most part, especially the “small talk” HATE. I’m not sure what “relationship/people talk” means though.

  5. That was a profoundly cool post…


  6. My dad, my husband, and my best friend are ALL INTJs…I was CRACKING up through all the pet peeves and how to handle because I recognize ever single trait in one or ALL of them. But obviously I love it…I keep bringing MORE INTJs into my life…and I am an ENFJ…..funny!

    Loved your letter to self!

  7. HYSTERICAL! I love it all. Thank you for sharing. I had quite a few perms, mahself. It wasn’t pretty! ;}

  8. i LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE the intjs poster- same face for a thousand emotions. that is so ME! i need to send it to my dad. it’s something that most people don’t get. thanks for the laugh! and the good reminder that we are who we are…

  9. I loved the MJ cameo as well, hilarious! Where did you get your personality assessed and the colorful blocks that you put up? Thanks!

  10. Adorable! You were … you are. Love this and your sweet spirit. And those socks rock! ;-)

  11. I’m so glad you wrote this. I feel like I know you so much better now. I love your honesty. And really loved hearing more of your heart.

    Love YOU!

  12. Hahaha I love it!

  13. Just another INFJ girl checking in. I *loved* those images! I know I don’t take argumentation personally, but I had never thought about someone *not* deconstructing an idea as being insulting because it means it’s not even an interesting idea – but it’s true! And my husband is an ISTJ, so he’s totally all about deconstructing and arguing. :)

  14. I can’t even imagine how different things might be if I was able to go back and explain being an INTJ to myself at a young age. And that’s not even to mention explaining my Enneagram type, as well, as the entire concept of personality types. It made such an impact when I finally did learn about it. But to know about it way back when would have been tremendous.

    Which all goes to show how great it would be for personality types to be taught more in schools and to kids at younger ages.

  15. LOL my husband and some of my close friends are INTJ – loved the posters.

    Am off to check my pinterest posters now (ESTJ)

    • I LOVE Mikie (INTJ) and I am an ESTJ. Maybe that’s why we kept “breaking up” in college, huh Mikie? We were so stupid crazy every time we got back together.

  16. how would one go about finding her meyers – briggs personality type??

  17. Glad to know a fellow CIU alum in blogland! I graduated in ’04, but we probably had some of the same profs. Loved this post!

  18. My high school chemistry teacher had us take the meyers-briggs test and I remember reading about INTJ and thinking “oooooh.” I love being an unusually weird person:)

    don’t ask me why we took that test in chemistry.

  19. i love the last shot of you, emily and michael jackson.

    you’re an INTJ….
    I’m as ESFJ….can we still be friends?

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